Brokeback Office Space Mountain

So my chair broke. It broke when I leaned too far back in to it. The break wasn't traumatic; like all things it was the fall preceding the accident that had the most drama to it.

I fell back in bullet-time slow motion. Why, you must be saying, it's because all things happen to us in slow motion as we experience them. Nuh-uh, not me!

I fell back in slow motion because I fell back in parts. It was as if my body decided, "okay, his butt fell, now let's wait for the back…"

My romp and my back fat went first. And as soon as those body parts settled, my chin was next, followed by my 2nd, 3rd and 4th chin. Next was my man-bosom and my stomach, which flew up to my face to check to see where my chins fell so that my stomach doesn't land on them.

Then, just as everything fell at slow-speed, it took them a minute to settle back in place before I could push myself up by my haunches.

So, now that I'm down a chair, someone mentioned maybe taking an extra chair from the office, since we have tons of open space now that some people have relocated. Now, I’m not going to, but ever since that idea was put in my head, I find it MIGHTY tempting. But I won't.