I wish I could make this up
...
SO! On my drive in today, I went to a local donut chain to get me something that'll wake me up, because for some reason, I woke up today with drool on my cheek and my eyelids hanging down to the bunion on my toe. So, the cost comes out to $1 and some change, right? But you don't want to put the dollar down in the dude's hand first because the change may roll of the dollar bill on to the ground and then you have to back up and drive forward until you can get your car door wide enough to pick up the change. So I give him the change first. But the dollar is lodged in between my fingers on the same hand I plopped the change down with. So, you can CLEARLY see, that there's a dollar still attached to my hand.
The look on his face was unbelievable. He looked and sounded like Rowan Atkins (Mr. Bean), when he played a guy with a thick South-European accent in "Rat Race".
"But you only gave me change, where's the dollar?"
"Dude, right here."
"But why did you only give me change?"
"Dude, right here! The dollar's in my hand."
"But it's $1 and some change."
His voice quivered and I thought he was going to cry. I mean, he was REALLY disappointed to look down and see that he's missing a dollar. In his other hand, he was holding what I wanted. Just take the dollar and give it to me! End of transaction, and you can go and cry into your new Marcia Cook book. Take my dollar!
"Dude, I know, here's the dollar."
At this point my hand was getting tired so I started waving it back and forth. Eventually, he rolled his eyes and took the dollar. And then I drove off.
I was going to make up a better ending to this, but the guy's despondent face over the fact that I gave him the change before the dollar (EVEN THOUGH THE DOLLAR AND THE CHANGE CAME FROM THE SAME HAND!) is plenty funny to me.
So, you make up a funnier ending! >!-[
Then I'll bite* it and bring it to stage.
*biter - BYE-TUH-RRR: Slang Someone who steals other people's art work and presents it as his own. Or just plain steals. Whatever, I stole this word from a hip-hop song a long time ago.
SO! On my drive in today, I went to a local donut chain to get me something that'll wake me up, because for some reason, I woke up today with drool on my cheek and my eyelids hanging down to the bunion on my toe. So, the cost comes out to $1 and some change, right? But you don't want to put the dollar down in the dude's hand first because the change may roll of the dollar bill on to the ground and then you have to back up and drive forward until you can get your car door wide enough to pick up the change. So I give him the change first. But the dollar is lodged in between my fingers on the same hand I plopped the change down with. So, you can CLEARLY see, that there's a dollar still attached to my hand.
The look on his face was unbelievable. He looked and sounded like Rowan Atkins (Mr. Bean), when he played a guy with a thick South-European accent in "Rat Race".
"But you only gave me change, where's the dollar?"
"Dude, right here."
"But why did you only give me change?"
"Dude, right here! The dollar's in my hand."
"But it's $1 and some change."
His voice quivered and I thought he was going to cry. I mean, he was REALLY disappointed to look down and see that he's missing a dollar. In his other hand, he was holding what I wanted. Just take the dollar and give it to me! End of transaction, and you can go and cry into your new Marcia Cook book. Take my dollar!
"Dude, I know, here's the dollar."
At this point my hand was getting tired so I started waving it back and forth. Eventually, he rolled his eyes and took the dollar. And then I drove off.
I was going to make up a better ending to this, but the guy's despondent face over the fact that I gave him the change before the dollar (EVEN THOUGH THE DOLLAR AND THE CHANGE CAME FROM THE SAME HAND!) is plenty funny to me.
So, you make up a funnier ending! >!-[
Then I'll bite* it and bring it to stage.
*biter - BYE-TUH-RRR: Slang Someone who steals other people's art work and presents it as his own. Or just plain steals. Whatever, I stole this word from a hip-hop song a long time ago.
posted by Coolhand at 11:31 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home